Family Quotes

A Short Story About A Mom Who Had Enough—A Lesson For “No-Longer-Dependents”

Except: A short story about a mom who had enough. She was tired, irritable, and sick. And her family kept using her as a crutch. Here’s what she did.

“Our family has become the definition of a successful blend. When you love someone, you love their journey—and that path leads you to the family dynamic you were meant to inherit and devote yourself to. Through my own childhood experience, I know how often we’re taught what a family should look like. And if your family doesn’t look like what we’ve been shown, we somehow feel incomplete. But really, families come in all versions, shapes, and sizes, and should be celebrated as part of our collective experience. That is what life has taught me.”
Alicia Keys, More Myself (Page 205)

Will you?

“the thing about having
an alcoholic parent
is an alcoholic parent
does not exist

simply
an alcoholic
who could not stay sober
long enough to raise their kids”
Rupi Kaur, Milk and Honey (Page 39)

Jon Gordon Quote on Tough Love and How Love Should Come First

“I believe in tough love. But for tough love to work, love must come first. We must love tough to bring out the best in those who lead.”
Jon Gordon

Beyond the Quote (106/365)

At what point does “tough love” go from being “love that’s tough” to just being hurtful, mean, and even abusive behavior? It’s an important distinction to make because there is certainly a line between being tough out of love and being tough because of harbored inner hate—or lack of control.

In my estimation, I think Jon has it right in the quote above. In order for tough love to work, love must come first. The intention behind the action has to be mindfully channeled through love and has to be conscious and deliberate. When tough actions are taken without the mind, they are usually emotionally charged, disproportionately harsh, and later regretted. Then, after it’s all said and done, those actions are guised behind “tough love” and proper responsibility isn’t always taken.

Family First, Work Second. The Power of Family Values in Business [Excerpt]

Excerpt: This is a story of a company who prioritized family first, work second into their business model. It’s an excerpt from the book, Do Nothing! Enjoy.

“A starting point for wisdom at any age might be to accept that you’re going to die—really accept it—and to feel more contented by the limits, not less. Modern medicine encourages us to consider death a test we can win or lose, something presided over by experts in white coats. But the elders offered a wiser perspective. None of us will get out of here alive, so we might as well live while we can.” ~ John Leland, Happiness is a Choice You Make (Page 45)

“If you want close, supportive relationships with friends and family members when you’re eighty-five, trace a series of moves leading up to that, all the way back to the present time. Pleasant, right? That’s the universe telling you to spend more time with people you care about. If you want a life of purpose, don’t you think you’d better start finding your purpose now? You may not get there by working more hours, coming home late, putting off time with your friends and family. Maybe you want a different job, a long talk with your son, a move to a different part of the country. Maybe the answer is ending a marriage in which you’re no longer helping each other grow. I never said this was going to be easy.” ~ John Leland, Happiness is a Choice You Make (Pages 16-17)

Ah, our most precious gift.

I Don’t Want To Talk About It [Book]

By: Terrence Real

From this Book: 12 Quotes

Book Overview: Twenty years of experience treating men and their families has convinced psychotherapist Terrence Real that depression is a silent epidemic in men—that men hide their condition from family, friends, and themselves to avoid the stigma of depression’s “un-manliness.” Problems that we think of as typically male—difficulty with intimacy, workaholism, alcoholism, abusive behavior, and rage—are really attempts to escape depression. And these escape attempts only hurt the people men love and pass their condition on to their children. This groundbreaking book is the “pathway out of darkness” that these men and their families seek. Real reveals how men can unearth their pain, heal themselves, restore relationships, and break the legacy of abuse.

Buy from Amazon! Listen on Audible!

Not enough time to read entire books? Check out Blinkist and get the key insights from popular nonfiction books in a fraction of the time. ‘Busy’ isn’t an excuse.

Post(s) Inspired by this Book:

25 Quotes on Masculinity, What Can Make It “Toxic,” and How To Break the Cycle of Harm to Our Boys and Men.

“Beyond a certain point in a man’s life, if he is to remain truly vital, he needs to be actively engaged in devotion to something other than his own success and happiness. The word discipline derives from the same root as the word disciple. Discipline means ‘to place oneself in the service of.’ Discipline is a form of devotion. A grown man with nothing to devote himself to is a man who is sick at heart. What a great many men in this culture choose to serve is their own reflected value, which they often believe serves the needs of their family, even while their families may be crying out for something different from them.” ~ Terrence Real, I Don’t Want To Talk About It

“The unresolved pain of previous generations operates in families like an emotional debt. We either face it or we leverage our children with it. When a man stands up to depression, the site of his battle may be inside his own head, but the struggle he wages has repercussions far beyond him. A man who transforms the internalized voice of contempt resists violence lying close to the heart of patriarchy itself. Such a man serves as a breakwall. The waves of pain that may have wreaked havoc across generations spill over him and lose their virulent force—sparing his children. The ‘difficult repentance’ such a man undertakes protects those who follow him. And his healing is a spiritual gift to those who came before. The reclaimed lost boy such a man discovers—the unearthed emotional, creative part of him—may not be merely the child of his own youth, but the lost child of his father’s youth, or even of his father’s father.” ~ Terrence Real, I Don’t Want To Talk About It

“Boys don’t hunger for fathers who will model traditional mores of masculinity. They hunger for fathers who will rescue them from it. They need fathers who have themselves emerged from the gauntlet of their own socialization with some degree of emotional intactness. Sons don’t want their father’s ‘balls’; they want their hearts. And, for many, the heart of a father is a difficult item to come by.” ~ Terrence Real, I Don’t Want To Talk About It

A loving reminder.

“If you have difficulties with your son or daughter, you may have the tendency to say: “You are not my daughter. My daughter would not behave like that” or “You are not my son. My son would never do things like that.” If you look deeply at yourself, you will see that these negative seeds are in you also. When you were young you made mistakes and you learned from your suffering. When your child makes mistakes, you need to help him understand so he will not do it again. When you can see your own weaknesses, you can say: “Who am I not to accept my son?” Your son is you. With this insight into non-duality, you can reconcile with your children.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, No Death, No Fear

“Look into a plum tree. In each plum on the tree there is a pit. That pit contains the plum tree and all previous generations of plum tree. The plum pit contains an eternity of plum trees. Inside the pit is an intelligence and wisdom that knows how to become a plum tree, how to produce branches, leaves, flowers and plums. It cannot do this on its own. It can only do this because it has received the experience and heritage of so many generations of ancestors. You are the same. You possess the wisdom and intelligence of how to become a full human being because you inherited an eternity of wisdom not only from your blood ancestors but from your spiritual ancestors, too.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, No Death, No Fear

“If you look at a friend with the eyes of a meditator, you will see in him or her all generations of their ancestors. You will be very respectful to them and to your own body because you will see their body and your body as the sacred home of all our ancestors. You will also see that our bodies are the source of all future generations. We will not damage our bodies, because that wouldn’t be kind to our descendants. We do not use drugs and we do not eat or drink things that have toxins or that will harm our bodies. This is because our insight of manifestation helps us to live in a healthy way, with clarity and responsibility.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, No Death, No Fear

“Walking slowly in the moonlight through the rows of tea plants, I noticed my mother was still with me. She was the moonlight caressing me as she had done so often, very tender, very sweet… wonderful! Each time my feet touched the earth I knew my mother was there with me. I knew this body was not mine alone but a living continuation of my mother and my father and my grandparents and great-grandparents. Of all my ancestors. These feet that I saw as ‘my’ feet were actually ‘our’ feet. Together my mother and I were leaving footprints in the damp soil.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, No Death, No Fear

Family Quotes

Give to the ones you love.