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Vulnerability Quotes

Brené Brown Quote on Perfectionism and How It’s Unattainable and Self-Destructive

    “Perfectionism is self-destructive simply because there is no such thing as perfect.  Perfection is an unattainable goal.  Additionally, perfectionism is more about perception – we want to be perceived as perfect.  Again, this is unattainable – there is no way to control perception, regardless of how much time and energy we spend trying.”

    Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

    Beyond the Quote (58/365)

    What a gift it would be if we were able to drop all of our desires for perfection.  And I’m not just talking about some of our desires for perfection—I mean all of them.  The desire to look perfect; to have perfect grades/ outcomes/ performances; to be perceived as perfect by others; to have perfect answers to questions; to be the perfect mother/ father/ spouse/ sibling; to have the perfect circumstances; to live the perfect life…  Why?  Because every single one of these desires creates suffering.  They create unattainable, unrealistic goals that lead to constant disappointment, self-judgement, and less acceptance of your self and others.  And in this world—in this reality—there is no such thing as perfect.

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      “Healthy self-esteem is the capacity—rarely taught to either sex in our culture—to hold oneself in warm regard even when colliding with one’s human shortcomings.  Our capacity to stay rooted in a compassionate understanding of one another’s flaws keeps us humane.  When we lose touch with our own frailties we become judgmental and dangerous to others.” ~ Terrence Real, I Don’t Want To Talk About It

        “I’m numb to judgement — even my own judgement of myself. I know I’m doing the best I can.  Judging yourself is a huge vulnerability because everyone else is already doing it for you. And if you’re not in that place, you’ve got no shot.  Everybody else sucks at stuff too.” ~ Gary Vaynerchuck, Medium

          “Simply having a phone on the table or within reach keeps the conversations shallow.  None of this would be a big deal if mobile and app-based conversation were complementing rather than replacing face-to-face conversation, but that’s not the case.  In fact, so many people are turning to digital to have potentially messy and emotional conversations in a less messy and emotional way.  It may bring more calm to a relationship, sure, but it also strips the vulnerability and revelation that come from looking someone in the eye, seeing how your words land, seeing how their body responds, hearing the catch in their breath, understanding what is truly going on between you in a way no emoji chain or composed text could ever express.  That emotional, messy, hard, exhilarating, don’t-know-what’s-coming-next space is where the moments that make life most worth living lie.  Kill the space, kill the moment.  Hello, tidy matrix and numbed-out life.” ~ Jonathan Fields, How To Live A Good Life

            “In cultivating compassion we draw from the wholeness of our experience – our suffering, our empathy, as well as our cruelty and terror.  It has to be this way.  Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded.  It’s a relationship between equals.  Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others.  Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.” ~ Pema Chödrön

              “Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it.  Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy – the experiences that make us the most vulnerable.  Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” ~ Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

                “Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness.  It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, ‘No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough.’  It’s going to bed at night thinking, ‘Yes I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging.'” ~ Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection