“It is very easy to think about love. It is very difficult to love. It is very easy to love the whole world. The real difficulty is to love a single human being. It is very easy to love God or humanity. The real problem arises when you come across a real person and you encounter him. To encounter him is to go through a great change and a great challenge. He is not going to be your slave and neither are you going to be a slave to him. That’s where the real problem arises. If you are going to be a slave or if he is going to be a slave, then there is no problem. The problem arises because nobody is here to play a slave—and nobody can be a slave. Everybody is a free agent… the whole being consists of freedom. Man is freedom.”
Osho, Courage (Page 157)
“It is difficult to love real people because a real person is not going to fulfill your expectations. He is not meant to. He is not here to fulfill anybody else’s expectations; he has to live his own life. And whenever he moves somewhere that goes against you or is not in tune with your feelings, emotions, your being, it becomes difficult.”
Osho, Courage (Page 157)
“There are two types of living: one fear-oriented, one love-oriented. Fear-oriented living can never lead you into deep relationship. You remain afraid, and the other cannot be allowed, cannot be allowed to penetrate you to your very core. To an extent you allow the other, but then the wall comes up and everything stops. The love-oriented person is one who is not afraid of the future, one who is not afraid of the result and the consequence, who lives here and now. Don’t be bothered about the result; that is the fear-oriented mind. Don’t think about what will happen out of it. Just be here and act totally. Don’t calculate. A fear-oriented man is always calculating, planning, safeguarding. His whole life is lost in this way.”
Osho, Courage (Page 79)
“Love is not a relationship. Love is a state of being; it has nothing to do with anybody else. One is not in love, one is love. And of course when one is love, one is in love—but that is an outcome, a by-product, that is not the source. The source is that one is love.”
Osho, Courage (Page 76)
“People come to me, they always say, ‘The other is not loving me.’ Nobody comes and says, ‘I am not loving the other.’ Love has become a demand: ‘The other is not loving me.’ Forget about the other! Love is such a beautiful phenomenon, if you love you will enjoy. And the more you love, the more you become lovable. The less you love and the more you demand that other should love you, the less and less you are lovable, the more and more you become closed, confined to your ego.”
Osho, Courage (Page 67)
“Ordinary people love only when their conditions are fulfilled. They say, ‘You should be like this, only then will I love.’ A mother says to the child, ‘I’ll love you only if you behave.’ A wife says to the husband, ‘You have to be this way, only then can I love you.’ Everybody creates conditions; love disappears. Love is an infinite sky! You cannot force it into narrow spaces, conditioned, limited. If you bring fresh air into your house and close it off from everywhere—all the windows closed, all the doors closed—soon it becomes stale. Whenever love happens it is a part of freedom; then soon you bring that fresh air into your house and everything goes stale; dirty.”
Osho, Courage (Page 66)
“Whenever you have been in love with someone, even for a single moment, was there any fear? It has never been found in any relationship where, if even for a single moment, two persons are in deep love and a meeting happens, they are tuned to each other—in that moment fear has never been found. Just as if the light is on and darkness has not been found—there is the secret key: love more.”
Osho, Courage (Page 64)
“Imagine this: You’re single. Forever. The end. Now imagine this: You have no friends. Forever. The end. Many of us misinterpret our need for strong friendships as a need for a romantic relationship. This is an unhealthy way to go about life. Being single forever may suck to think about, but it’s not exactly the end of the world. You could still have a pretty bitchin’ life anyway. Plenty of people do. Plenty of people choose to remain single for the majority of their lives and don’t feel as though they’re missing out on much. We’ve all been single before. And many of us in committed relationships will someday be single again. But friendless for the rest of your life? Well, let’s just say that these are the things that suicides are made of. You can be happy without a partner. You cannot be happy without friends. Prioritize your friendships.”
Mark Manson
Leslie Ralph Quote on Feeling Complete and How To Feel Whole Even With Holes In Your Life
“How can anyone feel complete when they only ever accept a fraction of themselves?”
Leslie Ralph, Tiny Buddha
Beyond the Quote (304/365)
Many people try and fill the “holes” in their lives with another person. The “holes” being fears, doubts, insecurities, and traumas that might have been a part of their past that leave them feeling un-whole. Like parts of them are missing. Like there are voids that they can’t quite figure out or understand. Like only “half” of a person who needs another “half” to feel completed. But, there are two problems with this way of thinking.
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“There is really no such thing as conditional love and unconditional love. There are conditions and there is love. When you talk about love, it has to be unconditional. The moment there is a condition, it just amounts to a transaction. Maybe a convenient transaction, maybe a good arrangement, but that will not fulfill you or transport you to another dimension. It is just convenient. Love need not necessarily be convenient; most of the time it is not. It takes life. You have to invest yourself.”
Sadhguru, Inner Engineering (Page 192)
Sadhguru Quote on Love and How It Has Nothing To Do With Someone Else
“Love has nothing to do with someone else. It is all about you. It is a way of being. It essentially means you have brought sweetness into your emotion. If a loved one travels to another country, would you still be able to love them? You would. If a loved one passed away, would you still be able to love them? You would. Even if a loved one is not physically with you anymore, you are still capable of being loving. So, what is love then? It is just your own quality. You are only using the other person as a key to open up what is already within you.”
Sadhguru, Inner Engineering (Page 65)
Beyond the Quote (290/365)
Why is it that our love gets locked behind a door that needs opening? Why is it that we aren’t able to open up to what is already within us on our own, intuitively, and without prompting? Why is love seen only (or perhaps primarily) as being a product of something that happens in a relationship between two people? For, as Sadhguru points out above, love has nothing to do with anyone else—it has only to do with you. And if that’s true and if love is a way of being, then where might we have lost our way? Why might we have stored our love away behind a locked door? Shouldn’t “sweetness into our emotion” be the default and most enjoyable state that beats any of the alternatives?
Read More »Sadhguru Quote on Love and How It Has Nothing To Do With Someone Else101 Thoughtful and Provoking Questions To Ask To Get To Know Someone
Excerpt: Looking for questions to ask to get to know someone? This list has you covered. Good for getting to know someone new or old, known or unknown, stranger or friend. Questions are the key to meaningful connection. Enjoy.
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Should Trust Be Earned Not Given, or Given Not Earned?
Excerpt: Unpopular opinion: I believe that trust should be given, not earned. Most people model their relationships off of the inverse. Read on and weigh in.
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Why I DON’T Do “Pinky Promises”
“We started our relationship based on pinky promises, where we linked our pinkies and kissed our hands to demonstrate that we cannot lie and break that bond. Because like little kids a pinky promise means a lot more.”
Unknown
Beyond the Quote (263/365)
I saw a meme that asked, “Do you trust pinky promises?” with the response, “You are wack if you don’t take these seriously.”
Unpopular opinion: You are wack if you need a promise to be “pinkyed” to be taken seriously.
Read More »Why I DON’T Do “Pinky Promises”24 Potent Ruth Bader Ginsburg Quotes on Equality, Relationships, and Living Up To One’s Potential
Excerpt: 24 potent and insightful Ruth Bader Ginsburg quotes that will help you remember and carry on the legacy of “The Notorious RBG.”
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Ruth Bader Ginsburg Quote on Intentionally Being A Little Deaf Towards Thoughtless Or Unkind Words
“Another often-asked question when I speak in public: ‘Do you have some good advice you might share with us?‘ Yes, I do. It comes from my savvy mother-in-law, advice she gave me on my wedding day. ‘In every good marriage,’ she counseled, ‘it helps sometimes to be a little deaf.’ I have followed that advice assiduously, and not only at home through fifty-six years of a marital partnership nonpareil. I have employed it as well in every workplace, including the Supreme Court of the United States. When a thoughtless or unkind word is spoken, best tune out. Reacting in anger or annoyance will not advance one’s ability to persuade.”
Ruth Bader Ginsburg, My Own Words
Beyond the Quote (260/365)
In every relationship in life, I think it helps to be a little deaf. And I, nor RBG, mean this in a demeaning, belittling, dismissive way for the other person. We mean it in a self-loving kind of way. We choose to be a little deaf towards the thoughtless and unkind types of remarks. The remarks that are not backed by thought, but are rather reactive, emotional, and are lacking of reason or fact. The remarks that do not serve the higher purpose of advancing the argument, but rather attack the person and are derogatory or unkind in nature. Those are the types of thoughts that should fall on deaf ears.
Read More »Ruth Bader Ginsburg Quote on Intentionally Being A Little Deaf Towards Thoughtless Or Unkind Words