How to always feel happy…
“If you say that you would like a certain man to be your lover, then in many dreams and in many fantasies you have already loved that man. And if it happens, then the real man is going to fall short of your fantasy; he is going to be just a carbon copy, because reality is never as fantastic as fantasy. Then you will be frustrated. But if you start liking that which is happening—if you don’t put your own will against the whole, if you simply say okay—whatever happens, you simply say yes—then you can never be miserable. Because no matter what happens, you are always in a positive attitude, ready to receive it and enjoy it.”
Osho, Everyday Osho (Page 157)
“As children we owned all of ourselves. As adults, in response to the expectations of others, we have had to hide much of ourselves away, out of sight even from our own eyes. The cost of such voluntary losses is great. No one can afford to give up any part of himself. All of you is worth something. Even the evil can be a source of vitality if only you can face it and transform it.”
Sheldon B. Kopp, If You Meet Buddha On The Road, Kill Him! (Page 141)
“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”
Joseph Campbell, The Hero’s Journey
“Anything that is given can be at once taken away. We have to learn never to expect anything, and when it comes it’s no more than a gift on loan.”
John McGahern, The Leavetaking, via Sunbeams (Page 109)
“It is a great obstacle to happiness to expect too much.”
Bernard de Fontenelle, via Sunbeams (Page 76)
“It is difficult to love real people because a real person is not going to fulfill your expectations. He is not meant to. He is not here to fulfill anybody else’s expectations; he has to live his own life. And whenever he moves somewhere that goes against you or is not in tune with your feelings, emotions, your being, it becomes difficult.”
Osho, Courage (Page 157)
Jiawei Han Quote on Expectations and How To Separate The Person From The Idea Of The Person
“You just like the idea of me. You like the person I present myself under circumstances that I can control. I choose what I say and how I say things. It’s like being attracted to a fictional character in a book. They are scripted and made up. If you think about it, through writings, we all script and make ourselves up. I don’t share the person I become when I am upset. I don’t show you how I look like when I sleep. I don’t tell you about all the times I’ve made someone cry. All the guilty things I’ve done and the bad thoughts I’ve had.”
Jiawei Han
Beyond the Quote (243/365)
And so is all too often the case in today’s world. Who are we really falling in love with? Who are we idolizing and emulating? Who are we really putting on a pedestal? Is it really the person or is it really just the idea of the person? More often than not, after careful introspection, you’ll find that many people in our lives are really just a product of ideas that represent idealistic and unrealistic images of the people we wished for them to be. We don’t see them for who they are, we see them as a projection from our mind—and perception is reality.
Read More »Jiawei Han Quote on Expectations and How To Separate The Person From The Idea Of The Person“I never felt outside pressure. I knew what I wanted to accomplish, and I knew how much work it took to achieve those goals. I then put in the work and trusted in it. Besides, the expectations I placed on myself were higher than what anyone expected from me.”
Kobe Bryant, Mamba Mentality (Page 98)
Leo Babauta Quote on Expectations and Our Attachment To Ideals
“It’s the nature of dealing with other people that we all get frustrated and angry from time to time. We take offense at the other person’s actions. But the other person’s actions aren’t the problem—it’s our attachment to the ideal we have of how they should behave, which of course is unrealistic, and the real problem is the Childish Mind wanting so badly for that ideal to be true.”
Leo Babauta, Essential Zen Habits (Page 188)
Beyond the Quote (175/365)
It’s one of the beautiful flaws of the human condition. Our ability to envision a life beyond where it is right now. A life that is filled with people, places, and things that excite us. A life that is filled with ideal situations and circumstances and opportunity. A life that would be a dream come true if only things played out how they’re supposed to according to what we see in our minds.
Read More »Leo Babauta Quote on Expectations and Our Attachment To IdealsRichard Carlson Quote on Letting Go Of Expectations and A Short Story About Finding Inner Peace
“Whenever you expect something to be a certain way and it isn’t, you’re upset and you suffer. On the other hand, when you let go of expectations, when you accept life as it is, you’re free.”
Richard Carlson, Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
Beyond the Quote (159/365)
A wealthy westerner, in search of peace of mind travels east to find a guru who might be able to help. After searching far and wide, through many towns and villages, he finally gets word of just the guru who can help. When they finally meet, the wise guru asks the wealthy westerner what is in the bag that he is holding so close to his heart. The wealthy man explains that it is a large sum of money that will be rewarded to whomever can help him find the inner peace that he so desperately hopes to find. The wise guru paused for a moment and reflected on the offer. Then, to everybody’s surprise, snatched the bag of money right from the man’s hands and ran away!
Read More »Richard Carlson Quote on Letting Go Of Expectations and A Short Story About Finding Inner PeaceHumble the Poet Quote on Managing Expectations and Going From “High” to “Low” to “None”
“Jumping into anything with low expectations is the best way to exceed expectations, so keep that in mind when deciding your next move.”
Humble the Poet, Things No One Else Can Teach Us (Page 131)
Beyond the Quote (79/365)
Rather than low expectations, try no expectations. When you hold a stance that maintains expectations, you are putting energy into a future result that will distract you from your present task. Once you have made up your mind about what your next move will be, do just that. And focus all of your resources on doing that task to the best of your ability—not into acquiring a certain result. Maintain the mindset of now and empty your mind of what might happen in the future. This is how you will produce your best work and this is how you will best take care of the tasks you set out to do. And as the saying goes, taking care of this moment is the best insurance you have for the next moment.
Read More »Humble the Poet Quote on Managing Expectations and Going From “High” to “Low” to “None”“In my past, I had hesitated dozens of times when presented with opportunities because I didn’t know whether they would pay off in the end. I began to realize over time that the opportunities themselves were the payoff, regardless of whether they turned out the way I wanted them to.” ~ Humble the Poet, Things No One Else Can Teach Us (Page 129)
