“If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves.”
Carl Jung, via Sunbeams (Page 156)
Parenting Quotes
“A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary.”
Dorothy C. Fisher, via Sunbeams (Page 137)
“The Cardinal Rule of Behavior Change: What gets rewarded, gets repeated. What gets punished, gets avoided. Don’t reward behavior you don’t want to see repeated.”
James Clear, Blog
“Love has no claims. Love has no expectations. Most of us were raised to become prostitutes. We have the illusion that with good behavior, good grades, lots of awards, pretty clothes, nice smiles, we can buy love. How many ifs were you raised with? I love you if you make it through high school. I love you if you bring good grades home. Boy, would I love you if I could say my son is a doctor. You become a doctor or a lawyer, or whatever your parents never were able to become, with the illusion that they will love you more. Love can never be bought. There are people who spend their lives prostituting themselves, pleasing other people in the hope of getting love. They will shop the rest of their lives for it and they will never find it.”
Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, via Sunbeams (Page 120)
“It is a good thing, it is even salutary, for a child to have periods of boredom, for him to learn to know the dialectics of exaggerated play and causeless, pure boredom.”
Gaston Bachelard, via Sunbeams (Page 117)
“Spirituality doesn’t look like sitting down and meditating. Spirituality looks like folding the towels in a sweet way and talking kindly to the people in the family even though you’ve had a long day. People often say to me, ‘I have so many things that take up my day. I don’t have time to take up a spiritual practice.’ And the thing is, being a wise parent or a spiritual parent doesn’t take extra time. It’s enfolded into the act of parenting.”
Sylvia Boorstein, via Becoming Wise (Page 223)
“There’s a reason why, when my son who’s six is crying, he needs a hug. It’s not just that he needs my love. He needs a boundary around his experience. He needs to know that the pain is contained and can be housed and it won’t be limiting his whole being. He gets a hug and he drops into his body.”
Matthew Stanford, via Becoming Wise (Page 68)
“We like to say that we don’t get to choose our parents, that they were given by chance—yet we can truly choose whose children we’d like to be.”
Seneca, On The Brevity Of Life, via The Daily Stoic (Page 173)
“What the mother sings to the cradle goes all the way down to the coffin.”
Henry Ward Beecher, via Sunbeams (Page 111)
“Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment, and especially on their children, than the unlived life of the parents.”
Carl Jung, via Sunbeams (Page 111)
“Do not confine your children to your own learning, for they were born in another time.”
Hebrew proverb, via Sunbeams (Page 54)
“There’s a time in every kid’s life when they’re still drawing every day and playing basketball every day. Then there’s a day when they stop drawing and keep playing basketball. They keep playing basketball because their parents do, and their parents don’t draw. At some point they’re like, ‘That can’t be cool because my parents don’t do it.’ You don’t think you’re cool, but if your kid says, ‘Dad, will you play with me?’ and you say, ‘Not now, I’m drawing,’ that kid is going to start drawing because that’s cool to them.”
Mo Willems
“I don’t praise a small child for doing what they ought to be able to do. I praise them when they do something really difficult—like sharing a toy or showing patience. I also think it is important to say ‘thank you.’ When I’m slow in getting a snack for a child, or slow to help them and they have been patient, I thank them. But I wouldn’t praise a child who is playing or reading.”
Charlotte Stiglitz, via The Examined Life (Page 21)
“A low self-love in the parent desires that his child should repeat his character and fortune. I suffer whenever I see that common sight of a parent or senior imposing his opinion and way of thinking and being on a young soul to which he is totally unfit. Cannot we let people be themselves, and enjoy life in their own way? You are trying to make another you. One’s enough.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson, Sunbeams (Page 21)
“For me, motherhood came with a litmus test: Is what I’m doing important enough for me to spend time away from my baby? If the answer was no, the task went the way of the Walkman cassette recorder—phased out. I was intent on doing what was best for my child, which, by default, was best for me.”
Alicia Keys, More Myself (Page 158)
Viktor Frankl Quote on Influence and How To Nurture Greatness in Others
“Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality. No one can become fully aware of the very essence of another human being unless he loves him. By his love he is enabled to see the essential traits and features in the beloved person; and even more, he sees that which is potential in him, which is not yet actualized but yet ought to be actualized. Furthermore, by his love, the loving person enables the beloved person to actualize these potentialities. By making him aware of what he can be and of what he should become, he makes these potentialities come true.”
Viktor Frankl, Brain Pickings
Beyond the Quote (323/365)
For those who are trying to influence greatness in others I suggest this: don’t demand greatness; create the environment for greatness and let greatness flower as it may. Of course when you take the time to plant a seed, you want it to flower to its full potential—to become the greatest flower it has the potential to be. After all, you’re investing all of this time and energy into preparing its soil, watering it daily, protecting it from leaf-eating predators, and ensuring it has bountiful access to sunlight. Nobody wants to invest all of that time and energy into a seed that fails to flower to its full potential.
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