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Jonathan Carroll Quote on Kindness in Small Gestures

    “I firmly believe in small gestures: pay for their coffee, hold the door for strangers, over tip, smile or try to be kind even when you don’t feel like it, pay compliments, chase the kid’s runaway ball down the sidewalk and throw it back to him, try to be larger than you are— particularly when it’s difficult. People do notice, people appreciate. I appreciate it when it’s done to (for) me. Small gestures can be an effort, or actually go against our grain (“I’m not a big one for paying compliments…”), but the irony is that almost every time you make them, you feel better about yourself. For a moment life suddenly feels lighter, a bit more Gene Kelly dancing in the rain.”

    Jonathan Carroll

    Beyond the Quote (90/365)

    Don’t let ideas of the grandiose stop you from acting in thoughtful, kind ways today.  Don’t let your desire to change the whole world (or have a huge impact) stop you from doing anything at all for those who are already in your world.  Brainstorming and coming up with master plans is great, but it should never be at the expense of those who surround you throughout your brainstorming process.  Never underestimate the power of small gestures done in selfless, loving ways, for those gestures may prove to be the very foundation for so much else in your life.

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    Thich Nhat Hanh Quote on Suffering and Having Compassion For Those Who Are In Pain

      “When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over.  He does not need punishment; he needs help.  That’s the message he is sending.”

      Thich Nhat Hanh

      Beyond the Quote (76/365)

      Below, you will find an exchange between another person and I in regards to the quote above and the caption I put up for it.  It’s a good exchange and there are elements that I think are worth elaborating on and discussing.  Here is the exchange:

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      The Dalai Lama Quote on Handling Problems by Zooming Out and Looking From a Broader Perspective

        “When we help others, the focus of our mind assumes a broader horizon within which we are able to see our own petty problems in a more realistic proportion.  What previously appeared to be daunting and unbearable, which is what often makes our problems so overwhelming, tends to lose its intensity.”

        Dalai Lama, The Art of Happiness

        Beyond the Quote (60/365)

        This is where the idea of “first world problems” comes from.  We will complain about and feel overwhelm from the problems that are prevalent in our world—as small or as large as that world is.  If our world is small from inexperience or lack of opportunity, then our small problems will appear to be big.  If our world is large from a plethora of experiences and plentiful opportunities, then even our “large” problems will appear to be small.  If what we have to complain about, for example, is some stupid thing someone said to us, and our world is small and we don’t have anything else affecting us, then why would we complain and worry about anything else?  That which doesn’t immediately affect us doesn’t immediately concern us.  The entire scope of our focus is directed at the only thing that is calling for it, which in this case, is the stupid thing someone said to us.  That is our entire world and that is our only problem to focus on.  Until it’s not.

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          “The journey of the bodhisattva warrior starts with the basic attitude of enlarging our motivation to include the welfare of others.  This is a simple response to this dark age.  Let’s begin right now by engaging love and compassion however we can—not tomorrow, but today.  By cultivating courage and confidence in ourselves and maintaining our seat, we can enjoy creating a sane environment; we can enjoy creating an enlightened society.  This doesn’t have to be overwhelming.  Start by looking at your own life and see what you can do, one step at a time.  Love is the saving grace.” ~ Sakyong Mipham, Turning the Mind Into An Ally (Page 212)

            “Maybe I should at least wait, to help you, until it’s clear that you want to be helped.  Carl Rogers, the famous humanistic psychologist, believed it was impossible to start a therapeutic relationship if the person seeking help did not want to improve.  Rogers believed it was impossible to convince someone to change for the better.  The desire to improve was, instead, the precondition for progress.  I’ve had court-mandated psychotherapy clients.  They did not want my help.  They were forced to seek it.  It did not work.  It was a travesty.” ~ Jordan Peterson, via 12 Rules for Life (Page 81)

              “Before you help someone, you should find out why that person is in trouble.  You shouldn’t merely assume that he or she is a noble victim of unjust circumstances and exploitation.  It’s the most unlikely explanation, not the most probable.  In my experience—clinical and otherwise—it’s just never been that simple.  Besides, if you buy the story that everything terrible just happened on its own, with no personal responsibility on the part of the victim, you deny that person all agency in the past (and, by implication, in the present and future, as well).  In this manner, you strip him or her of all power.” ~ Jordan Peterson, via 12 Rules for Life (Page 80)

                “Life is really about creating meaning.  And meaning does not come from what you get, it comes from what you give.  Ultimately, what you get will never make you happy long term.  But who you become and what you contribute will.” ~ Tony Robbins, Money: Master the Game

                  “When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: The people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous, and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own – not of the same blood or birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands, and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are obstructions.” ~ Marcus Aurelius, Meditations