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    “It seems to me, that if we love, we grieve. That’s the deal. That’s the pact. Grief and love are forever intertwined. Grief is the terrible reminder of the depths of our love and, like love, grief is non-negotiable.”

    Nick Cave

      “I have learned that Grief is a force of energy that cannot be controlled or predicted. It comes and goes on its own schedule. Grief does not obey your plans, or your wishes. Grief will do whatever it wants to you, whenever it wants to. In that regard, Grief has a lot in common with Love. The only way that I can “handle” Grief, then, is the same way that I “handle” Love — by not “handling” it. By bowing down before its power, in complete humility.”

      Elizabeth Gilbert 

        “That kind of violence… it tears open a hole, it’s like a black hole. It sucks language and meaning and all sense and whenever we show up and try to make sense of it, it reins hallow because there’s no making sense of this kind of mass violence—mass suffering. And when people have just survived it, it’s like you’re sitting on the edge of that black hole and you’re about to be sucked in and the only way that you don’t fall in is if someone is holding your hand. That’s all it takes.”

        Valarie Kaur

          “There is no fixing grief—there is only bearing it. And only by bearing it together do we survive it. There are no right words. There are no perfect words. If you need words you say, ‘You are grieving but you are not grieving alone.’”

          Valarie Kaur

            “My experience is that closure is an extraordinarily compelling fantasy of mourning. It is the fiction that we can love, lose, suffer and then do something to permanently end our sorrow. We want to believe we can reach closure because grief can surprise and disorder us—even years after our loss.”

            Stephen Grosz, The Examined Life (Page 209)

              “The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” ~ Elisabeth Kübler-Ross