“Compassion simply stated is leaving other people alone. You don’t lay trips. You exist as a statement of your own level of evolution. You are available to another human being, to provide what they need, to the extent that they ask. But you begin to see that it is a fallacy to think that you can impose a trip on another person.”
Ram Dass, Sunbeams (Page 28)
“It’s hard to pinpoint the precise moment when we internalize others’ assessments; it’s usually not just a single experience but rather a series of moments that bruise the spirit and lead us to distrust ourselves and those around us. And then we wake up at age seventeen or twenty-five or thirty-seven and realize we don’t know the last time we’ve lived life only to please ourselves.”
Alicia Keys, More Myself (Page 29)
“Do you need to give yourself permission to do something big for your special year? Just imagine, as an alternative, spending the rest of your life being dragged behind the Great Dane of your overcommitments to others. For five minutes it’s cute. Over a lifetime, it destroys what’s best in you and what’s unique about you. If you don’t care about that, it’s too bad. Maybe they got you, all those voices working away from the time you were a little [child], trying to convince you that your only needs were to meet other people’s needs. But I think you do care. A lot.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 151)
“We never lose the good parts of ourselves we really care about. All the parts of yourself you’re wanting to put back in your life are there waiting for you. The pain you feel comes from the way these missing parts of yourself slowly choke from lack of oxygen when they’re buried. All you have to do is identify what’s really missing. Then make sure you find room for it in your life.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 111)
“There was so much in my life I cared about—and of course I really loved being a therapist. But on another level there wasn’t anything in it I wanted just for me. It was as if my life had turned into a motel room and the truth was I could walk out of it without any sense that I was leaving anything of my own behind. A stranger could easily move into my life, and nothing would be different. I was happy as long as I didn’t think about who I was and what I really wanted for myself.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 44)
“The people in your life are truly interested in your being happy. The confusing thing is that they don’t go around advertising this. Your boss, your kids, your husband mostly talk about how they need this and they need that from you. But when you’re unhappy, a part of their world collapses. So if you have to shuffle your priorities around and put someone last who’s been coming first, and some of the people in your life start giving you grief, just remember how happy they’ll be when you’re happy.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 37)
“When you make yourself a top priority in your life for one year, you prove to yourself forever that you’re free, not trapped. You prove that you own your life, instead of feeling that everyone else’s claims on you come first. You prove that you can take care of yourself. You change the way you feel about your life forever. So do it now: cut one big slice from the pie of life and give it to yourself.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 17)
Mira Kirshenbaum Quote on Self-Care and How Important It Is To Give To Yourself
“If you don’t give to yourself, you will suffer damage.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 16)
Beyond the Quote (230/365)
More specifically, if you don’t give to yourself some of your own time, energy, and effort—you will suffer damage. And we’re not talking about presents. You can live just fine without ever buying yourself superfluous gifts. What you can’t live “just fine” without, however, are the gifts of “you” time, the self-directed energy required for self-discovery and healing, and the personal effort it takes to overcome challenges and become your best you. If you only ever direct your time, energy, and effort towards others—where are you supposed to get the time, energy, and effort required to maintain, upgrade, and improve yourself?
Read More »Mira Kirshenbaum Quote on Self-Care and How Important It Is To Give To Yourself“Giving yourself the gift of a year has a magical impact on your life because it restores the natural, necessary balance between giving to yourself and giving to others. There’s no reason for you to leave yourself outside of the equation. In the ecology of your life, you’re as important as anyone. If things curdle inside of you because you’ve neglected yourself, then ultimately they curdle for everyone.”
Mira Kirshenbaum, The Gift of a Year (Page 10)