“The one quick comment I would make has to do with this idea that we who live day-to-day with whatever [mental health] diagnosis we have are acting courageously or are brave to face the world. I don’t experience it as an act of courage or bravery; I experience it more as an act of defiance. When I swing my legs over the edge of the bed to face the day, what drives me is a refusal to lay back down; a defiance of the diagnosis. Defiance is often rooted in anger and I certainly feel and show that anger from time to time. People sometimes feel the anger is directed towards them—but it isn’t. Defiance is a strategy for engaging this thing. Of course defiance takes huge amounts of energy to sustain and of course, since I never actually will overcome this thing, that means that from time-to-time I need to back down; move away; rest. It’s like wrestling with a bear. Sometimes you get the bear; sometimes the bear gets you. But that’s okay, because sometimes, you get the bear.”
Paul Hogan
Beyond the Quote (72/365)
I do not have a mental health diagnosis and I, therefore, have never had to confront the challenges associated with having one. I have known people who have had them, my dad being one of them, and have witnessed the challenges first hand, but it has always been from the outside looking in. I know that it is an entirely different world from the outside looking in than it is from the inside looking out. But it is through our attempt to share, to the best of our ability, what the hell is going on from the inside looking out that we may ever gain insight and move forward in our own lives. After all, what is insight other than thoughts of value that are gained from peering into each other’s inner worlds? Insight is what illuminates the way.
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