Quote About Walking Your Own Path In Life (and Not Changing It To Match Someone Else’s)

“I hope you aren’t held back because of a number. And that you don’t rush into things because it feels like time is slipping by. I hope you do what’s right for you. Hold on. Slow down. And breathe in. Your age is your age. But more importantly, your life is your life. Don’t change your journey so that it matches someone else’s. We need to walk different paths so the whole world can be explored. Revel in the differences. And enjoy where you are, in this moment.”

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Beyond the Quote (182/365)

Don’t make it hard for people to leave your life—make it easy. How else to know for sure who really wants to be there? Would you rather have somebody in your life because they were barricaded in or because they genuinely wanted to be in? Would you rather have somebody feel obligated to be in your life or excited to be there? How good does it feel when somebody has a billion and one options and yet, continuously chooses to share the path with you day-in and day-out? I reckon it’s probably one of the best feelings in the world.

This, of course, isn’t the reality for most human relationships in life. Not everybody that starts with you on your journey will end with you on your journey—and that’s okay. Why should everybody’s paths line up exactly with yours? Is your path the only path that leads to fulfillment? Of course not! Have you looked at a map before? Have you seen all of the different paths and how they intersect, merge, diverge, cross, deviate, split, twist, and double back? Yeah, that’s how all of our paths in life look, too.

Our paths all start at unique points on the map. Then, they merge with people in our general vicinity and we move forward on these various paths together towards, well, someplace better. Otherwise, why walk the path at all if it wasn’t to get someplace better? These paths look like school, sports, extracurricular activities, social gatherings, travel, adventure, etc. Once the path has served its purpose and another path comes up that looks like it will take us closer to where we might want to be, we take it. Why wouldn’t we? Some people join you, some people take a different path, and some people stay on the path you’re leaving behind. And so it is.

The longer you walk a path in life the more rare it happens to be that any one person will continue to share that same path. It’s nothing personal. It’s simply a result of the sheer number of options that people get presented with every day and the completely unique perspectives, characteristics and aptitudes we each have. How amazing it truly is when two people’s paths align for any kind of extended period of time at all! And how beautiful it is when two people continue to choose the path they share with another person at the expense of all of the other options, simply because they genuinely feel like it’s the best path.

Where this notion becomes ugly is when somebody is forced to walk a certain path in life. Be it from their parents who force them to walk the path for a specific career. Be it from their friends who force them to walk the path they’re on because of selfishness, insecurity, or fear. Be it from their lover who force them to walk the path that they think is best for the relationship at the expense of the other person’s opinions, desires, or dreams.

Anything forced in life is ugly. I find this to be pretty universally true. Forcing people to stay in your life, on your path, for your own benefit and at their expense, is ugly. And “forcing” doesn’t just look like pushing, shoving, yelling, or dragging along. “Forcing” looks like guilt-tripping, black-mailing, shaming, threatening, manipulating, bribing, sabotaging, begging, or even relentless talking—and many times, in the more subtle and deceptive interpretations of those terms.

So, don’t force life. Focus on living your best life and carving out the path that is whole-heartedly for you. Stay on a path as long as it continues to take you to where you want to be. When another path comes up or the path that you’re on no longer serves you, contemplate that thought seriously, weight it against the alternative options, and act accordingly. And when somebody else does that who shares the path with you now, support them. Communicate your perspectives earnestly and genuinely, of course. But, don’t force them to act one way or another. Don’t make important life decisions any harder for them than they already are. Life is hard enough. Let’s help make the journey easier and more joyful for one another, eh?

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