“Every great opportunity has many reasons why it could fail. You have to trust your ability to solve problems along the way. People who look for reasons why things won’t work, struggle to take action. People who look for reasons why things will work—and solve problems as they arise—make things happen.”
James Clear, Blog
“It’s better to be alone than to spend time with toxic people. It’s better to do nothing than to work on something that doesn’t matter. It’s better to rest than to climb the wrong mountain.”
James Clear, Blog
“In my lowest moments, I fantasize about getting sick again. I miss the sense of purpose and clarity I felt while in treatment—the way staring your mortality straight in the eye simplifies things and reroutes your focus to what really matters. I miss the hospital’s ecosystem. Like me, everyone there was broken, but out here, among the living, I feel like an imposter, overwhelmed and unable to function.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 214)
“Moving on. It’s a phrase I obsess over: what it means, what it doesn’t how to do it for real. It seemed so easy at first, too easy, and it’s starting to dawn on me that moving on is a myth—a lie you sell yourself on when your life has become unendurable. It’s the delusion that you can build a barricade between yourself and your past—that you can ignore your pain, that you can bury your great love with a new relationship, that you are among the lucky few who get to skip over the hard work of grieving and healing and rebuilding—and that all of this, when it catches up to you, won’t come for blood.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 208)
“Grief is a ghost that visits without warning. It comes in the night and rips you from your sleep. It fills your chest with shards of glass. It interrupts you mid-laugh when you’re at a party, chastising you that, just for a moment, you’ve forgotten. It haunts you until it becomes a part of you, shadowing you breath for breath.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 190)
“Anyone with a smartphone is familiar with the feeling of having somehow, as if by accident, lost a precious hour to their device. But thinking ill of that behavior only induces guilt and makes the problem worse. It creates a moral hierarchy that some actions are good, and some are bad. We have to realize that anything we want to do with our time is fine as long as we do it on our schedule.”
Nir Eyal
“Melissa painted self-portraits from bed; I wrote self-portraits from bed. Watercolors and words were the drugs we preferred for our pain. We were learning that sometimes the only way to endure suffering is to transform it into art.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 157)
“Meaning is not found in the material realm—dinner, jazz, cocktails, conversation or whatever. Meaning is what’s left when everything else is stripped away.”
Howard, via Between Two Kingdoms (Page 126)
“For the person facing death, mourning begins in the present tense, in a series of private, preemptive goodbyes that take place long before the body’s last breath.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 122)
“What I’ve found to be important is mainly just the realization that everyone has all knowledge and all humanity within themselves. Individual minds are connected to a universal mind. All people need to do is find out how to get it and reach it when they need it. Karma is simple truth: you reap what you sow.”
Willie Nelson, via Sunbeams (Page 143)
“We are all terminal patients on this earth—the mystery is not ‘if’ but ‘when’ death appears in the plotline.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 119)
“It is always what is under pressure in us, especially under pressure of concealment—that explodes in poetry.”
Adrienne Rich, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 115)
“I decided to reimagine my survival as a creative act. If the chemo sores in my mouth made it too painful to talk, I would find new ways to communicate. As long as I was stuck in bed, my imagination would become the vessel that allowed me to travel beyond the confines of my room. If my body had grown so depleted that I now had only three functional hours each day, I would clarify my priorities and make the most of how I spent the time I had.”
Suleika Jaouad, Between Two Kingdoms (Page 109)
“Remember that you are an actor in a play, playing a character according to the will of the playwright—if a short play, then it’s short; if long, long. If he wishes you to play the beggar, play even that role well, just as you would if it were a cripple, a honcho, or an everyday person. For this is your duty, to perform well the character assigned you. That selection belongs to another.”
Epictetus, via The Daily Stoic (Page 333)
“Being pleasant and having a good attitude is a simple way to become luckier. Opportunities come through people, and people are more likely to bring opportunities to people they like. It’s hard to win if your attitude adds friction to every interpersonal experience.”
James Clear, Blog
“You don’t have to believe there is a god directing the universe, you just need to stop believing that you’re that director. As soon as you can attune your spirit to that idea, the easier and happier your life will be, because you will have given up the most potent addiction of all: control.”
Ryan Holiday, The Daily Stoic (Page 330)
“How willingly we will put up with unpleasantness if commanded to by the magic words ‘doctor’s orders.’ The doctors says you’ve got to take this nasty medicine, and you’ll do it. The doctor tells you you have to start sleeping hanging upside down like a bat. You’ll feel silly, but soon enough you’ll get to dangling because you think it will make you better. On the other hand, when it comes to external events, we fight like hell if anything happens contrary to our plans. But what if a doctor had prescribed this exact thing as part of our treatment? What if this was as good for us as medicine?”
Ryan Holiday, The Daily Stoic (Page 328)