Humble the Poet Quote on Emotional Intelligence and How To Deal With “Less Desirable” Emotions

“All of our emotions have value, and as unpleasant as some are, they’re reminders that we’re alive and have a whole lot going on inside.  Why not approach life with curiosity and wonder, instead of dread and fear.  We don’t avoid movies because we know they’ll end.  We enjoy the journey they take us on.”

Humble the Poet, Things No One Else Can Teach Us (Page 46)

Beyond the Quote (237/365)

Emotions are a signal of the state of your being. Many people categorize emotions as being either “positive” or “negative.” I think this is a dangerous practice that can lead you to suppress, ignore, invalidate, or even deny very valid signals from your body. Better to look at some emotions as being more desirable than others. States of happiness, excitement, enthusiasm, and joy, of course, are typically more desirable than sadness, anxiousness, or anger. But, don’t get it twisted. Sadness, anxiety, or anger are not “negative” emotions, per se.

They are valid expressions in response to either an imbalance in your body or an environmental factor that needs to be addressed. The problem with seeing certain emotions as negative is that it changes how you respond to them. You might start doing to them what you typically might do to negative people, news, or actions—cut them out, ignore them, or even feed into them and make them worse. This type of action is not appropriate for handling “less desirable” emotions.

Better, would be to turn inward and acknowledge the “less desirable” emotion for what it is—a signal. It’s your body’s way of telling you that something is “off” and is in need of attention. Sadness is a signal for compassion. Anxiety is a signal for courage. Anger is a signal for patience. And so on. The action for compassion is care. The action for courage is confrontation. The action for patience is meditation. These are much more appropriate actions for “less desirable” emotions.

One of the major hindrances with emotional connection, especially connection to those “less desirable” emotions is mental distraction and chatter. Being majorly consumed in your own head cuts you off from the news of your body. Just like living inside the bubble of your own life cuts you off from the news of the world. How can you ever know the news of the world if you cut yourself off from all of the signals that is news, media, and conversation? You can’t. For as long as you’re living inside the confines of your own bubble, the world will be a mystery. The same is true with the body. How can you ever expect to know the news of the body if you keep yourself cut off from the signals it sends? You can’t.

So, step away from the chatter of the mind. Turn inward and pay close attention to the signals that are being sent to you right now (and from now on) from the body. What type of emotions are you feeling? Name them. What are your emotions telling you to do? Write down the type(s) of action(s). What specifically can you do now, in the near future, and over the course of your life (the far future), to best deal with these emotions? How can you reinforce what’s desirable? How can you confront and overcome what’s not so desirable? And so it goes day-in and day-out. This isn’t a band-aid, one-time only activity. This is the practice. This is the way forward. This is the path to emotional balance and understanding.

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