“Nothing out there will ever satisfy you except temporarily and superficially, but you may need to experience many disillusionments before you realize that truth. Things and conditions can give you pleasure, but they will also give you pain. Things and conditions can give you pleasure, but they cannot give you joy. Nothing can give you joy. Joy is uncaused and arises from within as the joy of Being.”
Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now (Page 187)
Beyond the Quote (294/365)
Where’s your “happy place?” You know, the place you go to “escape” or maybe “find your bliss?” The beach? The mountains? A cabin in the woods? Here’s the thing, if the answer to those questions is anywhere outside of yourself, then you’re handicapping yourself. Your happiness is handicapped. Your bliss is handicapped. And your inner peace is handicapped.
As soon as you make your “happiness,” your “bliss,” or any internal feeling for that matter, dependent on an external factor or location, you create a dependency gap. How could you not be handicapping yourself? You’re markedly restricting your ability to function optimally. You’re limiting that which you have access to at any given moment to suddenly only being accessible in rare and infrequent circumstances. Why?
It’s not like when you go to the beach (or the mountains or a cabin) it gives you something that you didn’t already possess inside. It’s sand and water. It’s trees and rivers. It’s peaks and valleys. This isn’t to say that what you see isn’t gorgeous, breath-taking, and awe-inspiring. But, what you have to be mindful of are the conditions you’re placing on your optimal states of being. So, what is happening then?
What’s really happening when you go to the beach (or wherever) is you’re allowing yourself to feel “bliss,” “happiness,” or “inner peace”—states which you could feel at any time. The reason it might only happen at the beach, though, is that it’s possible you’ve taught yourself (or have been brainwashed to believe) that beaches are where “bliss” is found. So, when you go, you’re just (finally) giving yourself permission to relax and experience it.
But, it’s not like the beach is giving you permission. Or the mountains. Or the cabin. And that’s the point. Why should the destination matter? It’s YOUR permission. Nobody else controls your internal permissions. Why put something that is absolutely pivotal to living your best life—in a cabin in the woods? …That you only travel to for 2 weeks out of the year? What about the other 50 weeks? Are they supposed to be a sacrifice? Are we supposed to live without “bliss” or “happiness” for the rest of the time?
Rather than giving your “bliss” or “happiness” conditions—why not just let it flow? Did you know you could do that at any time? It certainly might be harder for some than others, but it’s certainly possible. And it’s certainly possible to bring those desirable states closer to where you are right now by reconditioning how you look at and access them.
Here’s the thing, you already know how to access them—the problem is that they might be restricted to certain locations. So, maybe figure out why that is, what you believe about those locations to be true (that’s not already true where you are), and figure out how you can bring more of that to your everyday life.
Again, beaches don’t give you anything that you don’t already arrive to the beach with. Mountains don’t give any special permissions that you aren’t already able to grant. Cabins in the woods don’t have secret stores of happiness that you can’t already find where you are right now.
What they might give you, however, is freedom from certain people. Or space away from the chaos to think. Or time alone to reflect and decompress. Or opportunities to be your unfiltered self. Or permission to relax without obligation or consequence. Or a chance to read, write, and focus on developing you. Or all of the above? Yes, how can you bring more of this, or whatever else, into your everyday life so that “bliss” can be your way of being rather than your brief escape? Better that than always needing to plan your next vacation.
In a Tweet:
Read Next: 13 Pico Iyer Quotes from The Art of Stillness to Inspire Your Next Trip to… Nowhere?
NEW In The Shop: Don’t Let The Tame Ones Tell You How To Live [Poster]
Why We ♥ It: Some of the best advice I (Matt here) ever got was: don’t take life advice from people who aren’t living a life you want to live and don’t take criticism from people you wouldn’t go to for advice. I created this poster to act as a reminder to listen more closely to our role models and less closely to our critics, trolls, and tamed-comfort-zone-hugger acquaintances. It’s also a perfect gift for the outdoor adventurer, travel enthusiast, or solo explorer (or soon to be). Available in print or digital download. 👇🏼
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Written by Matt Hogan
Founder of MoveMe Quotes. On a mission to help busy people do inner work—for better mental health; for healing; for personal growth. Find me on Twitter / IG / Medium. I also share daily insights here. 🌱
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