A Short Story About A Mom Who Had Enough—A Lesson For “No-Longer-Dependents”

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Except: A short story about a mom who had enough. She was tired, irritable, and sick. And her family kept using her as a crutch. Here’s what she did.

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My mom had a lot of problems.

She did not sleep and she felt exhausted. She was irritable and grumpy. She was always sick. Until one day, suddenly, she changed.

One day my dad said to her: “I’ve been looking for a job for three months and I haven’t found anything, I’m going to have a few beers with friends.”

My mom replied: “It’s okay.”

My brother said to her: “Mom, I’m doing poorly in all subjects at University.”

My mom replied: “Okay, you will recover, and if you don’t, well, you repeat the semester, but you pay the tuition.”

My sister said to her: “Mom, I smashed the car.”

My mom replied: “Okay daughter, take it to the workshop, find how to pay and while they fix it, get around by bus or subway.”

Her daughter-in-law said to her: “Mother-in-law, I come to spend a few months with you.”

My mom replied: “Okay, settle in the living room couch and look for some blankets in the closet.”

All of us gathered worried to see these reactions coming from Mom.

We suspected that she had gone to the doctor and that she was prescribe some pills called “I don’t give a damn about 1000 mg.”

Perhaps she was overdosing on these!

We then proposed to do an “intervention” to my mother to remove her from any possible addiction she had towards some anti-tantrum medication.

But what was not the surprise, when we all gathered around her and my mom explained: “It took me a long time to realize that each person is responsible for their life, it took me years to discover that my anguish, my mortification, my depression, my courage, my insomnia and my stress, did not solve their problems but aggravated mine.”

“I am not responsible for the actions of others, but I am responsible for the reactions I express to that.”

“Therefore, I came to the conclusion that my duty to myself is to remain calm and let each one solve what corresponds to them.”

“I have taken courses in yoga, meditation, miracles, human development, mental hygiene, vibration and neurolinguistic programming, and in all of them, I found a common denominator: finally they all lead to the same point.”

“And, it is that I can only interfere with myself, you have all the necessary resources to solve your own lives.”

“I can only give you my advice if you ask me and it depends on you to follow it or not.”

“So, from now on, I cease to be: the receptacle of your responsibilities, the sack of your guilt, the laundress of your remorse, the advocate of your faults, the wall of your lamentations, the depositary of your duties, who should solve your problems or spare a tire every time to fulfill your responsibilities.”

“From now on, I declare all independent and self-sufficient adults.”

Everyone at my mom’s house was speechless.

From that day on, the family began to function better, because everyone in the house knows exactly what it is that they need to do.

Source: Worth Sharing on Facebook

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Afterword:

For some of us this is hard, because we’ve grown up being the caregivers who feel responsible for others.

But, as is the case with most worthwhile things in life, what’s easy isn’t always right. It’s usually the hard path that leads to the long-term benefit.

And so it is with raising “No-Longer-Dependents.” At some point, we have to stop being their “crutch.” We have to let them bear the full weight of the consequences associated to their actions.

It’s the only way they’ll ever build up the strength we want so much for them to have.

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