Beyond the Quote

James Clear Quote on Decisions and How Understanding If One Is Reversible Or Not Can Help You Decide

“If a decision is reversible, the biggest risk is moving too slow. If a decision is irreversible, the biggest risk is moving too fast.”
James Clear, Blog

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Let’s start by figuring out which types of decisions are which. Not going to college, for example, is a decision that can easily be reversed. You can always go back to college at a later point in time. Going to college and getting a degree in something that you aren’t passionate about or uninterested in pursuing is a decision that is irreversible. Quickly committing to college when you’re unsure, undecided, or confused about your path is a big risk. Especially if the college you’re committing quickly to has a high tuition cost.

“If small things have the power to disturb you, then who you think you are is exactly that: small.”
Eckhart Tolle

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A pebble on the ground will be disturbed by just about anything that crosses its path. It’s too small to stand its ground. Everything from the kicks of a person’s shoe, to the rain the gathers and runs across the ground, to the wind, even, as it gusts up in minor blows, will all affect it. It is in the nature of the pebble to be moved and affected by forces larger than it.

“To make something good, just do it. To make something great, just re-do it, re-do it, re-do it. The secret to making fine things is in remaking them.”
Kevin Kelly, Blog

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The rough draft is never as good as the final copy. The first rendition is never as smooth as the final production. The initial prototype never functions as well as the end-stage product. In each of these cases, what’s the difference between the former and the latter? The re-doing. Re-doing doesn’t have to mean starting from scratch with each of your creations either—although it could be that. Rather, it’s more of an emphasis on constant and never-ending refinement.

“When you die you take absolutely nothing with you except your reputation.”
Kevin Kelly, Blog

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And what is your reputation made up of? The sum of all of the actions you took when you were alive. All of them. The actions you took when you were excited and joyful—and the actions you took when you were miserable and upset. It’s composed of the things you did for those who you admired, desired, and cared for—as well as the things you did for those who you pitied, hated, and didn’t pay any mind to. Your reputation is nothing more than the summary report of how well you followed the golden rule while you were alive.

“I should have known that somethin’ man-made couldn’t make me /
I say I’m makin’ music, or is music what creates me?”
Witt Lowry, Debt, Nevers Road

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Nothing man-made makes the man. It’s what the man makes that makes the man. What somebody else made is a reflection of them. You obtaining what they made doesn’t make you into any kind of different person at all. It might reveal the type of person you are but it doesn’t change who you are. To understand this is to understand the power in making and creating. To forget this is to forget and never realize who you are to yourself or the world.

“[The] appearance of triviality is deceptive: it is the things that occur every single day that truly make up our lives, and time spent the same way over and again adds up at an alarming rate.”
Jordan Peterson, via 12 Rules for Life (Page 117)

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It’s the healthy-or-not lifestyle that shapes the person, not the random workouts. It’s the career that defines the person, not the few-and-far-between vacations. It’s the everyday interactions with your friends and family that makes up the quality of the relationships, not the random and spontaneous adventures that you might take. Sure, the exotic and extraordinary moments of life might leave an impact, but it’s the mundane and ordinary moments that occur every single day that make up the life.

“Why do I love clouds? Because you can’t save a cloud like you can save a leaf or a flower or a rock – clouds are now.”
Terri Guillemets

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As I sit here struggling to find the right words to write, I find myself looking out the window, captivated by the movement of the clouds through the sky. It’s nothing special. Or it’s something really special? I can’t tell.

“there’s comfort
knowing that
today
i am the worst
i will ever
be
i will keep
growing and
i will be
kinder and
stronger and
braver tomorrow”
breanna morgan

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Think about how utterly amazing this idea is: if you decide today, right now, that you are going to commit to growth, self-love, and personal development from this point forward then today is the worst you will ever be. That’s right—only better days from here! The only way you can get worse is if you regress. If you get better and improve, then so will your life. How could this not be the case? Growth is the antithesis of regression. Growth represents improvement, progress, and development. Ultimately, committing to growth is committing to life—a better life.

“When you like a flower, you just pluck it. But, when you love a flower, you water it daily. One who understands this, understands life.”
Buddha

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“Liking” is superficial. “Loving” is deep. “Liking” is occasional and when it’s convenient. “Loving” is regular and prioritized. “Liking” keeps you the same. “Loving” helps you grow. One who understands the difference between “liking” and “loving” in life understands the difference between “existing” and “living” in life.

“Don’t settle for nice, for pleasant, for familiar. Keep looking until you find something that really moves you, that resonates with your core. And I mean this for people, for interests, for hobbies, for your possessions, clothes, music, books, art. Everything. Curate every aspect of your life, as much as you can. It’s in the things that deeply inspire us that we find ourselves. Surround yourself with truth, and you’ll have build yourself a heaven.”
Unknown

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Curate every aspect of your life because if you don’t then there will be aspects of your life that aren’t curated. Sounds like a, “duh” kind of statement, I know, but, to curate suggests a very personal process that involves choosing what and who to allow, what and who to avoid, what and who to include, and what and who to block out.

“When your world moves too fast and you lose yourself in the chaos, introduce yourself to each color of the sunset. Reacquaint yourself with the earth beneath your feet. Thank the air that surrounds you with every breath you take. Find yourself in the appreciation of life.”
Christy Ann Martine

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Out on a hike the other day, I crossed paths with a youthful, older couple who was in search of the same landmarks as I was. We shared the hiking path for a while and struck up a conversation about all of the best hiking spots we’ve experienced. We started by pointing out the amazing diversity of trails right in Western New York, then talked about spots in Pennsylvania, then steered the conversation towards “must-do” hikes out in Tennessee. You could feel the joy that the outdoors had brought them over the years and the beautiful memories that came with their outdoor experiences.

“The work we do is a reflection of who we are. If we’re sloppy at it, it’s because we’re sloppy inside. If we’re late at it, it’s because we’re late inside. If we’re bored by it, it’s because we’re bored inside, with ourselves, not with the work. The most menial work can be a piece of art when done by an artist. So the job here is not outside of ourselves, but inside of ourselves. How we do our work becomes a mirror of how we are inside.”
Michael Gerber, The E-Myth Revisited (Page 200)

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“Autograph your work with excellence,” has become a sort of mantra that I live by. Whatever I set out to do, I always try to give it my absolute best shot. And it doesn’t matter what it is. It could be something important like writing these articles or something that might be considered more menial like vacuuming the rug. The underlying idea is that all work that gets done always gets done with an autograph attached to the work. And that autograph, that work, as Gerber points out above, acts as a reflection of the person who did it. The question that you then have to ask yourself is, what does your work say about you?

Introduction: Fetch Me The Moon—A Short Zen Story

The Zen teacher’s dog loved his evening romp with his master. The dog would bound ahead to fetch a stick, then run back, wag his tail, and wait for the next game. On this particular evening, the teacher invited one of his brightest students to join him—a boy so intelligent that he became troubled by the contradictions in Buddhist doctrine.

“Beginning today, I will create a new future by creating a new me. No longer will I dwell in a pit of despair, moaning over squandered time and lost opportunity. I can do nothing about the past. My future is immediate. I will grasp it in both hands and carry it with running feet. When I am faced with the choice of doing nothing or doing something, I will always choose to act! I seize this moment. I choose now.”
Andy Andrews

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One of the best ways to build a better lifestyle is to focus less on trying to break bad habits and to focus more on building new, better habits. One of the best ways to feel better when you’re hurt is to focus less on analyzing the pain and to focus more on doing what heals you. One of the best ways to overcome hate is to focus less on the hate and to focus more on love. This is all to say, one of the best ways to move on from a rough past is to focus on building a better future.

“Micromanaging erodes people’s confidence, making them overly dependent on their leaders. Well-meaning leaders inadvertently sabotage their teams by rushing to the rescue and offering too much help. A leader needs to balance assistance with wu wei, backing off long enough to let people learn from their mistakes and develop competence.”
Diane Dreher

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In the earliest stages of a child’s development it is the responsibility of the parents to provide the most ideal nurturing environments and circumstances. Children are, essentially, completely dependent on what their parents provide. As they grow, however, so too does their ability to accept responsibility and manage their own surroundings—starting on a micro level and growing in size proportionally as they mature.

“If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree.”
Jim Rohn

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When we are born, we are but a seed in the ground. We have a nature and we are all affected by how we are nurtured. It is not a question of whether we are a product of one or the other—we are all a product of both. The nature of a tree, for example, is determined by the seed that it sprouts from. An oak tree seed has one nature and one nature only, to grow into an oak tree. An oak tree cannot grow into a maple tree nor can it grow into a redwood tree. It’s nature is predetermined by the genetic coding that is packaged within the seed from which it sprouts. This is it’s nature. Our nature—our genetic makeup—is determined by our parents. This cannot be changed.

“Sadness gives depth. Happiness gives height. Sadness gives roots. Happiness gives branches. Happiness is like a tree going into the sky, and sadness is like the roots going down into the womb of the earth. Both are needed, and the higher a tree goes, the deeper it goes, simultaneously. The bigger the tree, the bigger will be its roots. In fact, it is always in proportion. That’s its balance.”
Osho

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We don’t go through life, we grow through life. We don’t move along a timeline from birth to death in a unilateral direction. We move bilaterally through life—both upward and downward—like a tree. A tree doesn’t just grow a trunk and branches and leaves in a singular direction towards the sun. It grows roots, too—it grows downward. And without a proportional amount of roots the tree cannot stand. And neither can we.

“To live continually in thoughts of ill will, cynicism, suspicion, and envy, is to be confined in a self-made prison hole. But to think well of all, to be cheerful with all, to patiently learn to find the good in all – such unselfish thoughts are the very portals of heaven; and to dwell day by day in thoughts of peace toward every creature will bring abounding peace to their possessor.”
James Allen, As a Man Thinketh

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The people who put you through hell aren’t strong—they’re weak. And this isn’t an attack on their character, per se. They may be weak through no fault of their own—they might be a product of their environment. After all, if you grow up in hell how does one not carry feelings of hell with them? It is no easy feat to make your way from hell to heaven—but, that’s the point. It’s hard. It requires deliberate daily effort. It requires strength. People who are in heaven and treat others in “heavenly ways”—they are the ones who are strong.

“Are you a born writer? Were you put on earth to be a painter, a scientist, an apostle of peace? In the end the question can only be answered by action. Do it or don’t do it. It may help to think of it this way. If you were meant to cure cancer or write a symphony or crack cold fusion and you don’t do it, you not only hurt yourself, even destroy yourself. You hurt your children. You hurt me. You hurt the planet. You shame the angels who watch over you and you spite the Almighty, who created you and only you with your unique gifts, for the sole purpose of nudging the human race one millimeter farther along its path back to God. Creative work is not a selfish act or a bid for attention on the part of the actor. It’s a gift to the world and every being in it. Don’t cheat us of your contribution. Give us what you’ve got.”
Steven Pressfield, The War of Art

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Don’t think that just because I write every day that it’s easy for me. Writing is always hard. Just like sprinting is always hard. Neither ever gets easier—you just get better. Just today, for example, I sat down to write and noticed—really felt—the potency of the resistance that I had to overcome in order to begin. Here’s what the start to my writing looked like:

“If you made a list of people that you trusted/
Would you put your name down?”
NF, Only

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When I heard this line in NF’s song it stayed with me. It brilliantly orients an issue that so many of us confront on a regular basis—trust. Trust is the foundation of every relationship in our lives. Without trust there cannot be a stable relationship. Just like without a proper foundation there cannot be a stable building. Why is trust so important? Because trust is the key that unlocks and opens a person’s vulnerable side. And until a person is vulnerable and open to another—no true relationship can form.