“Reducing my social media usage has made me more aware of how addicted I was to the micro-gratification it gave me, and it has reduced the number of times I beat up on myself. I was no longer falling into the rabbit hole of other people’s carefully curated presentations of their lives and then comparing those presentations to the whole of myself—at least not as much as I was doing that before. And I instantly started feeling better.”
Humble the Poet, Things No One Else Can Teach Us (Page 225)
Beyond the Quote (86/365)
One tip that has helped me reduce my social media consumption was making it a rule that before I could consume, I had to produce. In other words, before I allowed myself to look at any of my social media timelines or feeds, I had to produce content for those feeds, first. This idea has forced me to engage and actively participate in the ongoing conversations rather than just passively and mindlessly consume them. Furthermore, by not scrolling as frequently on never-ending timelines, I have been able to focus more on myself and the tasks of my day rather than others and the undertakings of their days.
Social media consumption is a great way to stay connected with friends, followers, and role models. But, as with many things in life, too much social media consumption can become problematic. Possibly the most noteworthy problem is the one outlined by Humble in the quote above—falling into the rabbit hole of comparing the whole of your life to other people’s carefully curated presentations of their lives. By comparing the entirety of your life to the highlight reel of hundreds of other people, you can quickly start to pity and criticize yourself harshly. This is a dangerous rabbit hole, indeed, and needs to be mindfully put into check whenever possible.
The only person we should ever be comparing ourselves to is the person we were yesterday. I’m sure this isn’t news to you. But with social media it’s one of those concepts that is easy to say, but very hard to do and the application of this concept needs to be discussed. By comparing our current situation to other people’s portrayed situation, we eliminate countless factors of background understanding, story, circumstances, etc., into our thinking that drastically can affect how we feel about what we see.
If we see somebody squatting 300lbs, for example, and we haven’t even been able to squat 150lbs, then it’s very likely that we’re going to feel bad about that—why wouldn’t we? Somebody is already squatting more than 2x what we are able to. For most, that can be upsetting and demotivating. But what if that person also weighs 2x your weight? What if that person started at 150lbs and has been adding 1lb / week for 150 weeks? What if that person is an amateur body builder? The amount of unknown factors that could have gone into that 300lb squat is unfathomable—and it’s impossible to ever get the whole picture. That right there, fundamentally, is the problem. You can see your whole picture but you can’t see anybody else’s—so how could you ever fairly judge one against the other? You can’t. Which is why you have to stop.
The bottom line test that you need to be extremely mindful of when looking at the carefully curated content that other people post and share is—how it makes you feel. Does the content make you want to do better or does it make you feel worse? Does the content make you pity yourself and where you are on your journey or does it make you want to take another step forward? Does the content upset you or excite you? The honest answer to those questions will illuminate some critically important information that you should reflect on.
Social media should connect you to people who you would want to surround yourself with in real life—people who inspire you, uplift you, push you, challenge you, and engage with you in positive and constructive ways. And just like in real life, if the opposite is happening, then you need to unfollow, unfriend, mute, block, or just distance yourself from them. It’s already hard enough to get stuff done—especially the stuff that you know needs to get done that you don’t want to do in the first place.
Don’t make it harder on yourself. Mindfully curate your environments—physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially—and maximize your odds of getting stuff done that will guide you to your better version. Again, the only person you need to be comparing yourself to is who you were yesterday—social media hindered me from that sight for a long time. Producing before consuming has become a rule for me that has helped me out a lot. Maybe it will help you too? Good luck.
Don't Let the Motivation Stop There...!
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