Quote on How It’s Easier To Build Up A Child Than Repair An Adult

“It is easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult.”

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Beyond the Quote (49/365)

Learning how to properly educate, inspire, and guide our next generation is one of the most important duties we have as adults who have come before.  It is up to us to protect our kids from the world and at the same time, prepare them for it.  It is our obligation to give them the tools they need to succeed without simultaneously doing the work for them.

We have to take on the role of being the best teacher they will ever know, because it is our class that they will be showing up to more than anyone else’s.  And if we proceed without preparing and simply “make it up as we go,” we are bound to miss important lessons and ideas along the way—after all, if we don’t actually sit down and figure out what we want to teach, how will we ever teach what we want?

If you were asked to be a guest teacher at a local classroom, one of the first things you would probably want to know is what you’re supposed to teach.  At the very least you would want to know what subjects the students are learning about, what specific topics within those subjects you were supposed to cover, and what systems were in place within the classroom to ensure the information you taught was retained (and order was maintained).

If you’re not prepared and are without a class plan, a curriculum, or any idea what-so-ever of what you think they are supposed to know, then they, not you, are the ones who will suffer.  The same is true for your children.  You are their guest teacher EVERY DAY, and they are the ones who will suffer if you have no plans in place, no lessons in mind that you want to teach, no disciplinary tactics to follow when they break rules (because they will break rules), or no rules in place that are clearly defined.

Think you can wing it?  I have been teaching martial arts classes for over 15 years and can certainly teach a martial arts class on the fly—but I ALWAYS teach a better class when I go into it with a plan.  The setback with teaching on the fly is that you won’t be able to immerse yourself in the moment while you teach—you will be forced to plan as you go and your mind will be stuck thinking into the future for the duration of the lesson. 

The same is true when you make anything up on the fly.  You’ll be constantly projecting yourself (and various situations that come up) into the future to try and figure out how certain things might play out and you’ll be split-minded, reacting rather than responding, and often undecided.  The advantage to premeditating rules, lessons, disciplinary measures, values, morals, etc., ahead of time, is that they’re ready—the thinking is done.

When you actually sit down to figure out what the rules are, what the lessons you want to teach are, how you’re going to discipline your children, what values you want to stand for, and what morals you want to instill in your children, you can simply focus on execution and handling the moments that come up with care.  The importance of this cannot be understated.

Don’t be too quick to dismiss this post as being just for parents. This post is for parents, soon-to-be-parents, not-yet-thinking-about-becoming-a-parent, and not-gonna-be-a-parent people to reflect on alike.  Because the same lessons that you would draw on to guide your kids are the same lessons that should be guiding you.

Would you want your child to be responsible?  How responsible are you?  Are you doing the best you can?  Would you want your child to be disciplined?  How disciplined are you?  What strategies do you have in place that keep you doing what you know needs to get done?  Would you want your child to be patient and kind?  How patient and kind are you?  When somebody pisses you off, how do you respond?  These are questions worth sitting on. 

Finally, think back to your upbringing.  What did your parents do well?  What do you think they could’ve done better?  How can you become the person for others that you wish you had for yourself?  Sort through these thoughts and get your lesson plans ready.  We’re all students in life and we’re all learning from each other—parents and kids alike.  When it comes to our next generation though, let’s all take personal responsibility and influence them in the best ways we can devise—not on the fly, but in the best ways we have already devised.  It’s easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult.

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This post became the introduction for: 20 Powerful Phrases That Will Change Your Parenting Forever

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