“It was like, ‘Why are we sitting here? Let’s make our own movie.’ And if people come to see it, they come; and if they don’t, they don’t. Either way it beats sitting here going crazy. When you have so much energy and so much passion and no outlet for it and nobody cares, it’s just the worst feeling… This whole ‘I’m too cool to care’ thing… is so weak and stupid and played out, and it just brings everybody down. You shouldn’t be too cool to care, for Christ’s sake. You should be full of vim and vigor, and trying to do everything you can to make a change.”
Matt Damon
Beyond the Quote (48/365)
Regardless of what gets you there, when the end conclusion is not caring, then all of the life that comes from caring dissolves. Caring is exactly what drives us to listen, to pay attention, to take actions, to go above and beyond, and to think and reflect—essentially, when we don’t care, we’re choosing not to interact with the world (or at least that aspect of it).
Think about it. Without care, why would we want to listen or pay attention? What people say will only affect us in proportion to our care—when we care a lot, we’re deeply affected; when we don’t care at all, we’re unaffected. Moreover, without care, why would we choose to make any decision or take any kind of action? We only do that when we care about what happens as a result of our actions (or inactions). Finally, if we didn’t care, why would we waste any time thinking or reflecting? We only think and reflect about things we care about. When you take care out of the equation, you’re essentially taking yourself out of the equation of life—or more specifically, that aspect of life.
This certainly can have its useful applications in various situations. By choosing not to care about celebrity relationships, for example, you’re saving that particular mental bandwidth for other avenues. By choosing not to care about certain toxic people’s comments, you’re saving yourself from unnecessary negativity that might manifest as a result of what they say. By choosing not to care about astrophysics, you’re essentially saving your “care” for a field that does align with your aptitudes, abilities, and interests. Not caring about anything though? That’s a problem.
Why do some people choose to not care about things that they once did or that they probably should? One idea is that caring exposes vulnerability. If you care, that means that you could be let down, hurt, disappointed, crushed, manipulated, etc. Choosing not to care takes away that option. If you don’t care, then regardless of the outcome of any given situation, you’re left with the same norm that you’re comfortable with and used to. Essentially, rather than choosing to play the game and risk losing, you’re choosing not to play the game at all—and not only is that not fun, but it’s cowardly and self-limiting in many situations.
The only way to grow is to first try. Without that step, there’s no feedback—nothing to think about, nothing to talk about, and nothing to learn from. In every attempt, there’s either success or there’s failure—and both outcomes provide crucial insight for growth and self-understanding. When you succeed, your path and methods are reinforced. When you fail, you adjust your path and reevaluate your methods. Not trying (not caring) leads to nothing—this is why taking care out of the equation takes you out of the life equation. Life is lived through interaction. By choosing not to interact, you’re choosing not to participate in life.
So, before you decide you are “too cool” to care, take Matt Damon’s advice. You’re already full of vim and vigor—we all are. Some of us have just buried it, numbed it, suppressed it, forgotten about it, and decided we were “too cool” to have it. This is a regretful thing to lose. You should be taking every opportunity you can to interact with life—at least in ways that lead you further down your path.
Want to be in a movie but nobody cares enough to call you, hire you, and put you in their movie? You should stop caring and quickly suppress that vulnerability, right? No! You should make your own damn movie and get on with it! If people come to see it, they come; and if they don’t, they don’t. What’s important is that you chose to interact with life and you’re going to get better (and learn more about yourself) as a result. Care enough to do things that lead you further down your path. Care less about things that don’t. Remember that where you place your care, is where you place your life. Care wisely.
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Don't Let the Motivation Stop There...!
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